Stolen Goods

use the paypal cart or see below for more payment options

ALL PRICES INCLUDE SHIPPING VIA MEDIA MAIL IN THE USA ONLY
EMAIL US IF YOU LIVE OVERSEAS
Fred(at)criminaliq(dot)com

PLEASE NOTE NEW PRICES DUE TO US POSTAL SERVICES INCREASES

!!BRAND NEW!!

PEDESTRIANS

Functional Blackouts - Severed Tongue - $12.00 ppd

CD RELEASE DATE 6/6/6 BUT YOU CAN ORDER A COPY ON VINYL TODAY!! (all white vinyl copies of this record are now sold out)

VEE DEE - Further - LP Reissue
$12.00 ppd

 

The PEDESTRIANS - Future Shock CD/LP
12.00 ppd

LP
CD
 

The FUNCTIONAL BLACKOUTS - The Severed Tongue Speaks For Everyone

Just in time for the Nihilist Olympics, the band that put Criminal IQ Records on the Clap, The Functional Blackouts, release their most DEMENTED record yet! From the descent into a teen Crowley/Lovecraftian demon's brain omelet on "Heavy Breather" to scabies infected, serrated guitars, crazed vocal effects and kicking rhythm section, The Severed Tounge Speaks For Everyone stuns on par with the best as it soars into surreal states beyond O'Hare Airport (via Burning Airlines) and towards something beyond mere words that exists as both repulsive and fascinating. In fact, this messterpiece will make smart rock critics plagarize Richard Meltzer's most irreverent, wildest music reviews to describe it...its that good! Is this the best Criminal IQ release ever? No, it simply serves as one of the best releases in punk history. Think early BUTTHOLE SURFERS, PSYCHIC TV, PIL, POWERLESS, ANOTHER MANS SAC, 80’s FLIPPER, DIVINE HORSEMEN, FLESHEATERS or the nightmares bad late night burritos give you Great cover art and poster as well as a pot luck of different inserts.

VEE DEE - Furthur LP (CIQ07)

AVAILABLE ON VINYL ONCE MORE

VEE DEE appear to be the darkest and deepest on the Criminal IQ roster. The eclipe cover art (like the cover of the Bauhaus album The Sky Has Gone Out) reflects the emotional terrain covered in 60s psychedelic meets 70s/80s punk doom buggies. They have the potential, if they want to, to sculpt a vision as well as a sound. Flashes of lyrical provocation on cuts like "Flashes Of Her" and "Kaleidoscope Death Ray" make one think as well as drink and/or dance. I look forward to “furthur” experiments in their songs with harmonies, EXTRA fuzz bass, studio effects, and lyrics that probe existence while kicking your ass. If you want a band that rocks your head and your butt try Vee Dee as they stand out among many punk trios mining 60s-80s punk today.

From NOWWAVE
So, yeah, Vee Dee's debut album looks like crap on the outside. If you judged a book by its cover, you'd probably assume that these guys were a bunch of illiterate ex-con drunks getting by on one-and-a-half chords and an encyclopedic knowledge of anal sex. But put the disc in the player and BOOM, you got yourself a party. FINALLY we get another punk record with guts, balls, attitude, and something resembling real style ! These three Chi-Town ruffians play it loose and hard, grooving tough-as-nails 70s punk jams laced with lotsa requisite Windy City grit

From Aquariusrecords.com
"Huh, what's this? Vee Dee? It's got black and white, 'fucked up and photocopied' looking graphics, let's put it on...wow, some unknown punk rock outfit from decades past? The first song "Flashes Of Her" could be something
by Radio Birdman, or maybe even a song off of that Simply Saucer album... Now, this other track is reminding me of the Misfits. Good stuff. What's the story? Is this something outta the pages of Black To Comm fanzine? A band from one of those Bloodstains comps? Nope, these boys are from the here and now -- Chicago to be precise -- and they sure know how to make a retro-sounding (and looking) punk record that kicks ass.

Pedestrians - Future Shock CD (CIQ14) & LP (residue Records)
NEW!! LP IS ALREADY IN IT'S 2nd PRESSING!!
Former members of Chicago bands New Grenada, Dearborn SS, Dead Reckoning, and Trepan Nation leave their hardcore past to travel sideways in time and relative dimensions; simultaneously sounding like numerous late 70s to early or even mid 80s mid-tempo straight forward punk bands from various scenes and yet sounding timeless as well. The Pedestrians have a way of injecting meat and potatoes (okay fake meat for the vegans) arrangements into your blood and yet they remain distinguishable within the current Chicago scene of hardcore and punk n'roll. Their minimal attack sticks like a BBQ rib rack which compliments the sobering green (with red flashes)lyrical tea. The lyrics tend to be intelligent fragments of rage and despair that, when fused to the rock, has an almost Wire (Pink Flag era) effect. Mixing lyrical abstraction with quick scientific reductions of the history of the beat combo thus building their own weapon. They explore the possibilities of a few well placed dynamics shifts and other sparingly sprinkled curves once they have hypnotized you with their minimalism. I should also mention the snarling female backing vocals on "Caution Final Exit" are provided by Ashley from Signal Lost. This record made 8 top ten lists in Issue #273 of MAXIMUMROCKNROLLMAGAZINE Feb 2006.

REVIEWS
Suffice to say, this band plays driving punk rock that manages to sound both classic and totally fresh all at once – Maybe it’s their unique song writing sense that makes this one of the hands-down classics of 2005. - Maximumrocknroll Magazine

For the really great records there’s just not all that much to say, especially since my vocabulary consists of “rad” and “awesome.” But it’s pretty safe to say that if you like the inventiveness of Articles of Faith. The boiling-over anger of The Offenders, and the total steam roller feel of Fucked Up (and let’s face it – you do!), this is right up your alley. If you buy three records this year, this ought to be one of them. RAZORCAKE MAGAZINE # 30

I-ATTACK

I Attack - American Dream 7" - $5.50 ppd

7"

The Krunchies - In De Winkel -
$12.00 ppd

LP
CD
 

M.O.T.O. - Raw Power - $12.00 ppd

LP
CD
 

American Dream 7” EP (CIQ13)
I Attack throw bulldozers at you while skating in an empty swiming pool at some rich bastard's mansion while they're away. They carry on the hardcore attitude and sonic assault that Los Crudos and others hatched in Pilsen eons ago (even capturing Jose Crudos for being one mangler in their guitar tag team) with some 80's skate punk mixed in. They would be one of the better bands featured on a Mystic Records compilation if they were from the 80s. Rob shoots cynical venom all over the four originals criticizing the political spectrum of capitalism, fashion over substance followers, and anyone else that makes him get off his board! I Attack question everything which can only be healthy in a society that forces people to accept a miserable repressive and oppressive existence as the pre condition for "sanity"; I Attack still shows "Security is a dread disease." They also cover Impulse Manslaughter which is another reason to get this you fans of old underrated Chicago hardcore bands.
LIVE! FIGHT! THRIVE! SURVIVE!

In De Winkel LP/CD
Dan The Fan acted appropriately by dropping his pants onstage with The Krunchies (see CD insert); In De Winkel encourages outrageous behavior (high school lunchroom food fights included) as the clusterfuck of passionate energy ,driven by trebly, harsh, unrelenting, shrieking, and short impressive songs, jolts the id into action. Kevin's clean guitar tone cuts like The Feederz and JFA; Matt makes like Animal from The Muppet Show, Amanda's spirited piercing vocals should have been tape looped in deep echo for infinity through out the freakout part on "Not So Instant Karma”. The Krunchies will be remembered for In Der Winkel as it is one of the best high energy yet OBNOXIOUS and proud of it releases to come out of Chicago in some time.

SLEAZEGRINDER
“The guitar reminds me of a bratty child scribbling on the walls with a crayon, and the drums are like silverware falling off the table. The songs are all about a minute long, and if they were any longer, than surely, the neighbors would be calling the cops already. “In De Winkel” is dizzy, annoying, screechy, and spectacularly obnoxious from end to end.”

ODYSSEY ZINE
“Some albums are so fierce that you have to just soak it in with your mouth agape – letting the tracks sift through your brain while you manage only a single thought… That thought being: “son of a bitch!”. This is a veritable aural stabbing with speedy tempos, rampaging, locomotive-wreck guitar riffs,
and loony boy/girl shrieking on vocals. This is an easy favorite for the year.”

Available NOW on Vinyl and CD

Raw Power LP/CD (CIQ12)
Originally planned as “Metallic K.O.” but Tom Jones threatened legal action. Paul Caporino and company unleash more rocking humdingers on the world dominated by pap (not inspiring pop/power pop/pop punk) including yet another fresh weenie song "Getting It Up For Physics." M.O.T.O. have a feel for common anxiousness, desperation, fear, vulnerability, and adventure people feel when hungry for love; simultaneously mining areas of great old Chicago power pop bands like Green with The RAMONES, DICKIES, DIDGITS etc. Energy and wit! Some organ (and kick ass harpsichord) and acoustic guitar are added for more texture. This years version of RAW POWER allows Paul to show his song writing muscle and coupled with the music they becomes “Ubermoto” leaving a song that sticks with you for a life time. These are yet more winning examples of MOTO's might which deserve to be played all over the country wherever there are radios available...especially in diners that have great milkshakes and creative ways of preparing fast food. MOTO makes great summer music!
This record was NUMBER 1 CD in the CHICAGO READER for 2005

REVIEWS
Who on Earth would call their album Raw Power? At first you think they don’t know what they’re doing, then you think their just stupidly audacious, then you find out that they’ve been around since 1988 and so it’s just a great reverse inverse record-geek joke.
They’re like “This is our Raw Power!” and they’re right; It’s two giant Balls on fire! – ARTHUR MAGAZINE

If Raw Power had been released in the late 70s it might now be ranked alongside the best of the Ramones or the Undertones. The 14 lo-fi, high-adrenaline tunes charge by in 34 minutes, and the band's boneheaded shtick belies a rigorous economy and focus. Caporino gets an impressive variety of shades from a three-chord palette: His snotty bubblegum melodies on songs like "Deliver Deliver Deliver" and "Piano Jazz Radio" can trigger surprisingly powerful swells of emotion. He does goofy gabba-gabba-hey punk rock with the best of them ("Getting It Up for Physics," "Flipping You Off With Every Finger of My Hand"), but his wise guy's take on adolescence is as sophisticated as it is funny -- he can invoke the ache of longing by denying that he feels anything. And on "Primeval" -- less a conventional pop song than a mantra -- he manages to make compelling music by repeating a single line for two minutes. Nothing against all the bands out there trying to guess which kind of punk will get fashionable next, but Raw Power is still gonna sound great in 20 years, when everybody's forgotten about Interpol -- it's rock 'n' roll without a sell-by date. (Bob Mehr)CHICAGO READER

Rotten Fruits 7" - $5.50 ppd
7 Inch
 

M.O.T.O. - Single File CD - $12.00 ppd

CD

VEE DEE - Further CD
$12.00 ppd

CD

 

Abomination 7" (CIQ11)
Self proclaimed “Gayest Band in Chicago”, The Rotten Fruits offer up this Uber-Spazzy 7” guaranteed to give you a chuckle. When we ran the ROTTEN FRUITS 7” we had reviewers all over the place crying out WTF? Try listening to side one of this and turning to side two without laughing out loud at the absurdity of it all – it’s impossible. One for the music snobs here.

FULL FRONTAL UK
“I sat there and laughed as I couldn´t believe these would be put out on record! Maybe they work better live when everyones pissed up and having fun?”
Excellent stuff…ahem
Thankfully MRR seemed to get it the gist of it. These queer punks have made a funny EP here. The animated, snotty and whiny vocals spew shockingly naughty messages. Their music can be a little simple, sloppy, and subdued, but the vocals elevate the energy and propel the songs into some serious absurdity. For example "Skinhead Boys,"a ska style tune, works well with the whole skinhead homosexual adventure-it leaves me weak-kneed and light-headed! Bold, brash, and beautiful!” We’ll leave it up to you.

Click Buy now.

Single File CD (CIQ09)
Led Zeppelin may have their "Whole Lotta Luv" but M.O.T.O. have "Crystalize My Penis". Re-issue of all M.O.T.O. 45's 1988 - 1996. This album has so much good shit on it, it borders on the ridiculous!      

FURTHUR LP/CD (CIQ07)
VEE DEE appear to be the darkest and deepest on the Criminal IQ roster. The eclipe cover art (like the cover of the Bauhaus album The Sky Has Gone Out) reflects the emotional terrain covered in 60s psychedelic meets 70s/80s punk doom buggies. They have the potential, if they want to, to sculpt a vision as well as a sound. Flashes of lyrical provocation on cuts like "Flashes Of Her" and "Kaleidoscope Death Ray" make one think as well as drink and/or dance. I look forward to “furthur” experiments in their songs with harmonies, EXTRA fuzz bass, studio effects, and lyrics that probe existence while kicking your ass. If you want a band that rocks your head and your butt try Vee Dee as they stand out among many punk trios mining 60s-80s punk today.

From NOWWAVE
So, yeah, Vee Dee's debut album looks like crap on the outside. If you judged a book by its cover, you'd probably assume that these guys were a bunch of illiterate ex-con drunks getting by on one-and-a-half chords and an encyclopedic knowledge of anal sex. But put the disc in the player and BOOM, you got yourself a party. FINALLY we get another punk record with guts, balls, attitude, and something resembling real style ! These three Chi-Town ruffians play it loose and hard, grooving tough-as-nails 70s punk jams laced with lotsa requisite Windy City grit

From Aquariusrecords.com
"Huh, what's this? Vee Dee? It's got black and white, 'fucked up and photocopied' looking graphics, let's put it on...wow, some unknown punk rock outfit from decades past? The first song "Flashes Of Her" could be something
by Radio Birdman, or maybe even a song off of that Simply Saucer album... Now, this other track is reminding me of the Misfits. Good stuff. What's the story? Is this something outta the pages of Black To Comm fanzine? A band from one of those Bloodstains comps? Nope, these boys are from the here and now -- Chicago to be precise -- and they sure know how to make a retro-sounding (and looking) punk record that kicks ass.

Yep VEE DEE kick major ass; the vinyl of this record is sold out. Don’t miss the CD

Functional Blackouts - S/T - $12.00  ppd
LP - Sold Out
CD   
 
Krunchies - Interrobang 7" EP - $5.50  ppd
Manhanlders S/T LP/CD - $12.00 ppd
LP    
CD   
 
S/T LP (CIQ03) S/T CD (CIQ04)
Holy fucking shit! The most crazed intensely wild and dangerous album of all time. Now available in CD format as well.
Interrobang EP (CIQ06)
Out Now! 6 hyper-speed explosions of punk rock in it's purest form. Full color cover with lyric sheet inside.
- BACK IN STOCK!!
S/T CD/LP (CIQ08)
Young punkettes armed with guitars and drums give twelve salvos of sassy, manic yet dynamic songs sure to appeal to more young and old punk addicts. They take advantage of studio effects which sweeten the Molotovs coming your way. They play like an ungovernable street gang and aren’t afraid to explore some glamarchy on this recording as well. Although it could do with some subtler moments this will be the one to blast while cruising around in a stolen cop car! If you enjoy women rocking out, and you have a problem if you don't, add The Manhandlers to your music collection or they will add your head to their taxidermy collection on the wall next to their Tura Santana posters.

 

        
/ MUSHUGANAS

MAYBE CHICAGO?

M.O.T.O. - Kill M.O.T.O. - $10.99 - SOLD OUT

The Phenoms/Mushuganas split 45 - SOLD OUT and OUT OF PRINT Maybe Chicago (comp) $10.99 - SOLD OUT
Kill M.O.T.O. CD/LP (CIQ02)
This record showed up on top ten lists nationwide last year.
Split 45 (CIQ01)
WOW! You're in luck. A distributer just returned 12 copies of this 45 - our first 7". They are the silk screened cover copies as well. 2 great garage stompers with plenty of alpha-male vocals on the Phenoms side. Stoner rock n roll from the last 45 to be produced by the everso loveable Mushuganas.
V/A CD (CIQ05)
There have been some great raw punk rock compilations over the years, NO NEW YORK (1978), YES LA (1979), and now MAYBE CHICAGO? Unreleased trax from Chicago with, Functional Blackouts, VEEDEE, Baseball Furies, Tyrades, Ponys, Manhandlers, Hot Machines, the Dirges, White Outs, Phantom 3, Twat Vibe, and the Busy Kids.

!!THESE JUST IN!!

 

CRIMINAL IQ T-SHIRTS
 

THROW ANOTHER 10 BUCKS DOWN WITH YOUR ORDER AND SPECIFY YOUR SIZE AND WE'LL SEND YOU ONE OF THESE

COOL AS SHIT BAD MUTHAFUCKIN PUNK SHIRTS!
Black Girls Shirts Only! S/M/L/XL No Guys sizes left!!

Size
Colour

Make checks payable to:
CRIMINAL IQ RECORDS
3540 N. Southport
Chicago, IL 60657
USA
or

CRIMINAL IQ EUROPE
148 Crossbrook St.
Cheshunt, Herts
EN8 8JY UK

EMAIL AHEAD for Euro prices

or use the Paypal buttons above or Paypal criminaliq at hotmail dot com. Include $1 per order for paypal usage.

If you're a shop and you want to stock our stuff you should talk to these guys about getting some titles:

USA

Ebullition - Home of hardcore the way you want it and the only distributor with it's own owl. Publishers of HeartattaCk zine
Bomp (mail order)
Carrot Top Distribution
Disgruntled Music (mail order/Distro)
Choke Distribution
Southern Distribution
Revolver
Underground Medicine
Subterranean
Red Line Distribution
INTERPUNK (mail order)
GONER RECORDS (mail order)

Or email Fred@criminaliq.com and we'll get in touch

EUROPE
Criminal IQ Europe
148 Crossbrook St.
Cheshunt, Herts EN8 8JY
UK

CANADA
Zaxxon Mail order

JAPAN
WE ARE LOOKING FOR DISTRIBUTION AND BUKAKKE PARTIES

AUSTRALIA
WE ARE LOOKING FOR DISTRIBUTION AND PEOPLE TO STAY WITH FOR UNDEFINED PERIODS OF TIME.

EASTERN EUROPE
WE ARE LOOKING FOR DISTRIBUTION AND ADVICE ON BUILDING LO-GRADE NUCLEAR DEVICES.

ANTARCTICA
WE ARE LOOKING FOR DISTRIBUTION. THOSE BRAINIACS RESEARCHING DOWN THERE GET PRETTY DAMN BORED.